Podcasts - The Spawn of the Devil?

Let me start by saying this is not the cranky rant of fan who was up all night and on her third cup of Joe.

I have been listening to podcasts lately.

Different subjects, different sites. Some on my favorite boards, others on sites of various interests.

All I can say is, "Has anyone ever been to Open Mike night at a local comedy club"?

I use to go to them quite often, in my college youth, hoping to see the next big comedy sensation. I longed to be able to say, "I knew him/her when . . ."

As the months rolled by I became educated in the square log principle. That for every good talent X there was a square log of talentless, drunken, "frat hounds" who though aptitude was accentuated by booze.

They were at least funny while drunk. There was a whole host of other participants who were not funny at all, or worse, knew THEY had talent and it was YOU who did not get how talented they were.

After a while I gave up on finding the "next big thing" and left that up to the talent scouts who were getting paid to endure such material.

"What," you may be asking at this point, "does this have to do with podcasts Lacey?"

Glad you asked.

In the beginning there was the Internet (invented by Al Gore I believe). Then came communities sites and Blogs, like this fine example. And then came file sharing.

Information flowed out of the source and into our homes. Bad shows were replaced by better ones, and information was corrected and disseminated. All was good.

Then came podcasts. In the beginning this was OK because they were generally handled by professional people who had experience in broadcasting. They knew how to speak and write and produce a product for sale. One people would want to listen to.

Now, it seems, we are back to open mike night at the comedy club.
Podcast hosts, drawn in by the lure of a microphone, seem to think that a $29 purchase at Best Buy imbibes them with talent, wit, charm, and the ability to captivate their listeners. Just like three boilermakers gives you comedic talent.

Hosting their favorite subjects they flip on the switch and in their everyday, monotonous, voice rattle off five to ten minutes of disjointed information BEFORE starting the program you went to the podcast for. They will throw in personal information, unrelated to the topic, pause for five to ten seconds to collect their thoughts, use "um" and "like" as if they were proper parts of speech, and then prattle on some more as if they had to fill time before the network feed kicked in.

It reminds me of when I was young and got my first tape recorder. I was so enamored with my voice that I spent the whole weekend talking into the microphone and playing it back. My father, being the good father that he is, sat through more homemade productions than a good man should. I don't think he has ever really forgiven me.

If you are going to host a podcast, and please folks, if you have something to say, please do, understand that the microphone does not give you talent. That there is no such thing as "natural ability" and that, like any form of entertainment, you need to work at it, and spit and polish it, before it is ready to go on the road.

Write a script. If you are one of those lucky people who can work from and outline, then make an outline. Then practice your introduction several times before you record it.

Do your audience a favor and have respect for them.
If you do, then they will have respect for you and your podcast will be a success, and not the source of rants on OTR websites.